Haunted Mansion, The (2003)

Family Rated PG

The Haunted Mansion plays like a contest between Eddie Murphy’s popping eyes and his gaping mouth: Which one can more forcefully convey fright? Based on a Disney theme-park attraction, this features enough touches from the ride itself that it often feels like you’re visiting the theme park with Murphy in tow. Although in real life

Kill Bill – Vol. 2 (2004)

Action/Adventure Rated R

This is the point at which Quentin Tarantino officially crossed the line from junk collector to junk producer. The first Kill Bill installment at least intrinsically offered hope that its follow-up would add a bit of substance to the proceedings. Instead, the second half of Tarantino’s tribute to every crappy kung fu/revenge/biker flick he had

John Q (2002)

Drama Rated PG-13

Denzel Washington plays a working-class father who takes a hospital hostage to force the heart transplant his son needs but his insurance won’t pay for. As a rousing, self-righteous melodrama, John Q gets your blood pumping, but as a subtle portrayal of what it’s like to be poor and underinsured, the movie is ludicrous.

Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D, The (2005)

Family Rated PG

Painful to watch, on just about every level imaginable. The bleary 3-D sequences induce headaches, as does the strained, after-school-special narrative. Then there is the fact that writer-director Robert Rodriguez created the movie with the help of his 8-year-old son. Not only did I have to suffer through the film, but reviewing it made me

Mambo Italiano (2003)

Comedy Rated R

Another My Big Fat Greek Wedding knockoff, this offers a few slight twists: its setting is an immigrant Italian community in Canada and its star-crossed lovers are gay. Other than that, this is as broad, farcical and blandly stereotypical as its predecessor. The movie’s vision of Italian life isn’t that far away from that of

El Mariachi (1992)

Action/Adventure Rated R

Legend holds that Robert Rodriguez made his debut for just $7,000, but more impressive than his thrift was his knack for offbeat humor, inventively staged action and an even control of pacing rarely found in low-budget flicks. This is really a comedy, as a traveling musician (Carlos Gallardo) is mistaken for a vicious criminal. It’s

Bringing Down the House (2003)

Comedy Rated PG-13

This disappointing disaster spins endless jokes out of the assumptions that Wasps are stiff and uptight and blacks are loud and loose. Steve Martin plays Peter Sanderson, a Beverly Hills lawyer who gets mixed up with an ex-con named Charlene (Queen Latifah). The movie intends to unite black and white audiences, and it probably does

Brothers Grimm, The (2005)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

The manic, messy and magical style of director Terry Gilliam (Brazil, 12 Monkeys) defines this clever riff on fairy tales, in which the title brothers (Matt Damon and Heath Ledger, both delightfully light on their feet) pretend to be ghostbusters in 19th-century Germany. Like Neil Jordan’s The Company of Wolves and Guillermo del Toro’s Pan’s

Peter Pan (1953)

Family Rated G

Though adapted from J.M. Barrie’s play, this might as well be a parable about the eternal childhood of the cinema. Peter Pan refuses to grow up and so, for better and worse, do the movies. Peter is a delightfully unpolished figure: troublesome, impudent and with feral eyebrows that would never be found on the usual

Meet the Robinsons (2007)

Family Rated PG

“Even in its messiness, (it) at least suffers from wild ambition, not laziness. And I’d rather have a family movie go over kids’ heads than insult their intelligence.