Aguirre, The Wrath of God (1972)

Action/Adventure Rated NR

  The inherent distraction built into nearly every movie directed by German legend Werner Herzog – wondering how he got the actors, let alone his camera, in such godforsaken places – dominates in this recreation of a Spanish explorer’s doomed expedition down the Amazon River. It doesn’t really matter, though, if such distracting thoughts undermine

Live Free or Die Hard (2007)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

This is a throwback to a time when action movies were measured by the number of cars they crashed, which means you have to take the 1980s good – muscular, CGI-light stunt work – with the 1980s bad (namely a level of mindlessness that makes Ocean’s Thirteen look like an art film). By now, Bruce

Fantastic Four:
Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)

Action/Adventure Rated PG

“This has to be the most humdrum collection of comic book characters to have ever dripped from a pen. They make you long for the thrilling adventures of someone called, say, The Accountant.

Day Watch (2007)

Action/Adventure Rated R

"…nearly gave me a seizure (and movie-wise, I don’t seizure lightly)."

Pirates of the Caribbean:
At World’s End (2007)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

“…any movie that involves something called the ‘nine pieces of eight’ doesn’t really care if you can follow it.

Perfect Storm, The (2000)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

A major disappointment, this dramatization of a real-life 1991 boating tragedy plays like a high-brow version of Speed 2: Cruise Control. Whereas that movie was just an excuse to crash a cruise ship into a harbor, this film twiddles its dramatic thumbs until we finally get to those much-advertised killer waves. From nautical specialist Wolfgang

Eight Below (2006)

Action/Adventure Rated PG

Penguins occasionally appear in this Disney adventure set in Antarctica, but if the intent was to conjure up warm associations with March of the Penguins, which came out a bit earlier, the strategy backfires. After being mesmerized by the struggles of actual antarctic creatures, why would kids want to settle for this faux animal drama,

Recruit, The (2003)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

The Recruit, about a computer whiz (Colin Farrell) who is tapped by a shadowy figure (Al Pacino) to enter an elite CIA training program, takes the spy movie maxim that no one can be trusted and blows it up to outrageous proportions. There’s hardly a single conversation between the characters that doesn’t involve some level

Count of Monte Cristo, The (2002)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

Almost ridiculous enough to be delectable camp, this umpteenth adaptation of Alexandre Dumas’ novel is the kind of overheated historical adventure in which the bad guys sport yellow teeth rather than black hats. While most of the cast seems aware of the inherent silliness – Guy Pearce voraciously chews each line of dialogue as the

Half Past Dead (2002)

Action/Adventure Rated PG-13

What’s more tired: Die Hard scenarios or Steven Seagal? We get both in Half Past Dead, an endlessly silly shoot-’em-up in which Seagal plays an undercover FBI agent imprisoned on reopened Alcatraz Island. Seagal’s co-star is rapper Ja Rule, and the two make a ludicrous pair. The well-past-his-prime Seagal tries to hide his burgeoning belly